Area: Berlin,
WG.
Job Title:
bigmember QA/QC Manager
I
Duties: The
selected candidate will perform quality control at our West
German bigmember
Bonnet factory.
The candidate should have at least 3 years experience in member
Bonnet mechanics, and should have at least 1 year with a firm
that manufactured head gear.
Posting date:
Open, applications always accepted.
Area: Keene,
NH.
Job Title:
Elastic Fabricator for the bigmember
Morning Downward Bender
Duties: Strong
background in member flinging desired. Knowledge of plastic
fabrication, and the stretch strength of the human member (note:
experience in hippopotamus member stretch length will be accepted
in place of human experience). The candidate should also have
experience in wall spray, urine stream arch, and brief slap.
Posting date:
July 1, 2001. Applications due by July 2, 2010.
Area: Port
Washington, NY.
Job Title:
Member at Large, Public Meeting Support (PMS).
Duties: As
the Member at Large (PMS), the incumbent will be a front line
contact at our biannual Member Vendor Trade Show. The selected
candidate must have a working knowledge of bigmember
protocol, including measuring standards, devices, and background
of company. A blonde, 5', 2" female, that is gorgeous and follows
commands nicely will be selected over all others. Sorry, but
we are doing the interviews.
Posting date:
Open, applications always accepted.
Area: Agalgclicktiya,
Zaire.
Job Title:
Choyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyo Plant Grower.
Duties: Work
in hostile environment and perfect the art of culturing the
Choyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyo plant in a hot, humid environment. Candidate
will have a strong horticulture background and be able to work
long hours with blisters and bug bites all over their body.
Must be able to chew long fibrous sticks to extract the juices
of the bitter, acidic plant for days on end.
Posting date:
Open, applications always accepted.
Area: Brent
"Gordo" Alpern's House (location revealed at interview)
Job Title:
Job Title revealed at interview
Duties: Duties
revealed at interview.
Posting date:
Open, applications always accepted.
