bigmember Wear
ON SALE NOW!
bigmember all-cotton T-shirts

bigmember quality hats

Premium bigmember Gear!

bigmember quick spray (several marvelous scents / flavors!)

bigmember winder
(a place to keep those extra inches)

 
 

Although this unit LOOKS bulky, it isn't, take our word for it. It is made from a very light zilimbium metal and can fit inside boxers or briefs. Designed exclusively for bigmembers, by bigmembers, this unit puts the wrap on appendages that are flaccid flappers. You can go commando now without any worry about "head peek out," or "shaft shift." End the embarrassment. Specifically fitted with an internal member accommodation vesicle, the Member Winder will not accidentally squash or tear like other models you may have seen offered recently. When you order this device, we will send you free a bottle of bigmembers Tube Lube which makes your first Winder experience a little smoother.* This product was so adored by one of our friends Tito Molten, that he even wrote a little poem for us:

The Winder

When things are so tender with your wonderful member
And you just got it caught in a Cadillac fender
And your dangling away like leaves in September
Just wind up your rod and be proud of your gender
If you can't afford a winder, talk to your lender
Before you go out on a six week bender
If it dangles too long it may get caught in a blender

*Warning: In 1999 during one of our prototype tests, we found Eric Munchflaven embedded between the hose at the center of the hose support. Luckily, Eric lived and actually gained 2 inches in the deal. Nevertheless, he sued us, and we have to warn users to definitely USE THE INCLUDED FLOOR BOLTS!!!!!!

We propose to market this beauty for only $29.91 ea.